FAIL!!!

So...I decided that I needed to lose some weight. Well more like a ton of weight. It is something that I continue to struggle with.. The idea of having another child is frightening. I would for sure not be in tip top shape. I still have not made an effort to lose the "baby weight" and Shane is now 2..almost 2.5 years old. Needless to say I have not been very good at accomplishing anything for a few years.

I like to take things s-l-o-w. I tried to quit drinking Dr.Pepper for like the 50th time. I lasted 2 weeks. I would have gone longer..but people's lives were in danger and I felt it was best to get back on the stuff. I sound like a drug addict..but I am addicted and I was mean, grumpy and no fun to be around during my detox. So...I failed. Dr. Pepper is now back in my life. The Dr. is not allowed in my house..but is invited to join me at lunch and dinner and long car rides..or short ones..or times I drive just to pick up the Dr and nothing else...ugghhhh...why do you have to be so good Dr. Bad..Bad...Dr.

Ok, back to the issue at hand...my fatness. I say that I will not do certain things until I am skinny. It is such a horrible thing to be over weight and not do things you love. I decided to do a juice diet... more so..a detox. My Brother in law did it and totally killed it. So, I watched the ever so life changing documentary. You know the ones that make you feel so passionate at the end you feel you can conquer the world..or that everything you do is wrong..or everyone around you is crazy. I was impressed because this guy went on a juice only diet for two months. He did say that was extreme..but the idea of juicing for just a week was, in general, a great idea. I need to detox and I need to get some good nutrients in my body. I am pretty sure if I were to get my blood drawn it would consist of mostly Dr. Pepper.

I was really motivated and after talking with my sister found out she had a juicer..perfect! I went to Sprouts spent 40.00 on produce and was ready to conquer my Monday! I made my first juice for breakfast...and that was my last juice..not for the day...FOREVER! EWWWW...gross..no way..are you serious??? Blahhhhhh! Needless to say..it was nasty and I failed! "Oh Lord, what am I going to do with myself"..I cried out.  I realized that I am doing things that are too extreme. I am not an extreme person. God has taught me that I need to think things through...I have to mull over decisions for quite sometime. The best way for me to lose the weight is to eat less..eat healthy and exercise. That is the key..if you can juice than that is great..but if not it's ok. Just be healthy..find the time to exercise..even if it is only 15 minutes a day. So, if I get preggo that's fine I had PLENTY of time to lose the weight and I will just have to be extra careful when the time comes. Plus...I would just lose the weight and then get fat again..I guess I will just get fatter and then have even more weight to lose. It happens...failure is ok as long as I keep trying and eventually I will be SKINNY:).

You might be wondering what I did with all that extra produce I had....I made this(below..see there is spinach in there and plan on making an Apple Pie with the apples...Winning!!!! :) Update: Just made a carrot cake with all those carrots I bought:) I need help..hahahaha.

Hanging onto my 20's life crisis

Yes, it is true..in five short days I will be 29. Getting closer and closer to the dreaded 30s. My youth will be over in one year. I will start to shrivel up(aka wrinkles) gain MORE weight in my mid section...find gray hairs in my once beautiful long blonde locks...most likely I will have to cut my hair short...that seems to be the norm of 30 year olds. I might even find myself wearing the ever popular mom jeans. Yes...my youth will most certainly be over.

Ok...maybe I am exaggerating a bit(just a bit) but seriously this is scary stuff people. I am already listening to country because "there is nothing else good on the radio" ***gasp*** it has begun...I am on my way to getting old..one step closer to death. Sorry there I go again exaggerating...or am I speaking the truth?????hmmmm....

So, you can tell I am not one of those people who look forward to aging. This year is hard...my sister in law warned me she said 30 wasn't bad but for some reason 29 was. It is your last year of your 20s. I thought once I got closer to 30 I would not have that notion that 30 is old, as i did when I was 5, but folks, it IS old. Maybe, I am not so thrilled with this idea of getting older because I am not living my life as I would really want. Am I enjoying every aspect of this wonderful gift of life God has given me? Maybe that is the reason for my detest of aging.

I need to look deeper into this thinking of mine...(hold on this is going to be crazy). In the last few months we lost a few people. For some reason in my life people usually die in threes. I know they say this happens with celebrities too. Scott lost a cousin...we were not close to him..but it is still family and were saddened. We then lost a wonderful dear friend at church..Jim. Jim was a caring and helpful soul. He handed out the bulletins at church each Sunday morning and I would always wait for him to give me one..because his hugs were the BEST:). Then within a week we lost another man at our church, Ken. Ken and Jim were good friends. So, our church was faced with planning two memorials within a week of each other. Jim's memorial was great...but what was unexpected for me was Ken's Celebration of Life Memorial. I did not know Ken..I knew his wife. They were very involved in our church. The stories that were shared and Ken's memorial touched me so. Everyone loved him dearly. He had a twin brother..who shared stories about them growing up and all the trouble they got into. It was so uplifting to hear what a Godly man he was and the legacy he left behind. It is hard to lose anyone. Death is never easy. But the legacy that he left behind made me think about my own life. Family members came up and talked about things he had taught them.Not just how to fix a car or other day to day stuff...but most importantly he shared GOD. You could see that Ken had shared God's love with everyone he came in contact with. Even in his pain he praised God.

Although I did not know Ken...which I am very bummed I did not...his love for God uplifted me. I am young..despite what my crazy brain tells me. Even if I have many years left or just a few...what I need to be focused on is leaving a legacy behind that is gratifying to Christ. One that is filled with triumphs of leading others to Christ. There is a lot of inner cleansing that I need to do. I need to get over somethings. Thankfully God is patient.

God sees our earthly life as preparation for the greater joys of heaven(See Mark 8:36). No matter what earthly issues I may have with getting older or even fears I have of death..I need to work on my legacy that I will leave behind. Will your memorial be one that gives hope to others??Will it encourage and uplift family and friends??? What are you doing to live your life for the one who gave you this wonderful gift of life?

In conclusion, I am still learning to embrace my "old age" but really working through my fears and taking the time to cultivate loving relationships. I still have a long way to go...and many hurdles to jump..but God is waiting and His love alone will get me through any more of my "life crisis" moments I may have. PTL!!!

Strawberry Lemonade Cupcakes

I recently helped host a dual baby shower. It ended up just being a single baby shower as one girl had her baby girl that morning! I decided to do something different than the usual vanilla and chocolate. Nothing wrong with the classics, but I wanted to try something new. I did a Strawberry Cupcake with a Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting. The frosting had cream cheese, butter and shortening..so of course it was delish:). This one is a little more time consuming if you make the lemon curd yourself. I never made lemon curd before so I wanted to try it. I can cross that off of my baking bucket list.You can always just buy it pre-made in the store. This is a great Summer Time cupcake. Happy Baking!

Strawberry Lemonade Cupcakes with Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting
From Cupboard to Cupboard


For Cupcakes:
1 package white cake mix [I like Betty Crocker]
1 (3 oz) package strawberry jello
1 cup mashed fresh strawberries [1 1/2 cups whole=1 cup mashed]
1 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup buttermilk (If you do not have buttermilk..I always use regular milk and add about a tsp of lemon juice per cup of milk stir and let sit for about a minute)
4 eggs

In a large bowl, stir together cake mix and jello mix.  Make a well in the center and pour in mashed strawberries, oil, milk, and eggs.  Beat on low speed until blended.  Scrape bowl and beat 2 minutes on medium speed.  Pour batter into prepared cupcake pans with liners. Makes about 30 cupcakes.Bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes or until cupcakes are done. Cool on wire rack until completely cooled.

For Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting:
1/2 cup crisco
1/2 cup butter, softened
1 (8 oz) pkg cream cheese, softened
1 tablespoon clear vanilla extract
2 pounds powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 Tablespoons lemon juice
2 Tablespoons lemon curd
1 drop yellow food coloring
1 tablespoon milk if needed( I did not need)

Cream together shortening, butter, and cream cheese until good and smooth.  Add vanilla and combine.  Sift together powdered sugar and salt and slowly add to creamed mixture.  Add lemon juice, lemon curd, and coloring and mix well.  If the frosting is too stiff, add milk.

Round Two-Target

I stopped by Target to get a "few" things. It was a pretty good trip..only one item was FREE..but I mainly was just going to pick up some things that I needed and happened to have coupons for. So I saved about 35.00.

I bought Dove Shampoo and Conditioner. It is normally 3.49 each and I got it for 1.49ea. There are some better deals going on right now but for cheaper quality shampoos so I decided to get these instead.

Nail Polish Remover(Target brand) Reg-.97..got for .47
Peroxide- Reg-.62...got for .12
Ibprofn(24 tabs) .99..had a 1.00 coupon...FREEEEE..came home to print another as you can do two per computer and they were gone:( Gotta remember to always print two!!!!

Some other deals on items I needed were:
Nivea Sun Kissed Gradual Tanner(New Fav) Reg-7.69 with coupons paid 2.69
Nivea Lotion Reg-5.04 with coupons paid 2.04
Revlon Lip Gloss- Reg 6.49 paid 3.49 Great Deal!!!
This was my splurge...but I have wanted to try it for so long..It is the Sally Hansen peel and stick nail polish stuff:) It is regularly 8.54 I got it for 6.54 not that great but the best deal I have seen so far. Could have waited for a sale but I really wanted it:)
I also got some great deals on clothes. I had quite a few 3.00 off and 2.00 off Target Coupons for apparel..mainly tops...and you can use those on clearance so I picked up a few tanks for 4-5.00.

I felt like I spent a lot in one day...but I realized that I don't have to get any toiletries...makeup or clothes..for quite some time now. 

Happy Couponing!!!!

Couponin' Ain't Easy!

I have not been on top of my coupon game lately. There hasn't been that great of deals on items I actually use so I kind of took a break. Then this week tons of deals popped up and I was in it to win it. I am such a dork! Saving money is fun and addicting. I got quite a few things for free and that makes me happy! Cheap is awesome but free is better! I stuck to my rules of not spending too much time hunting down coupons or buying items I would not use so I think I did pretty good. Here is a pic and a break down of the first round I did today during my lunch break at Vons:

Angel Soft Toilet Paper was on sale with an in-ad coupon for 4.99 which is a great price..normally 8.99. I also printed a coupon for .50cents off and my store doubles(totally didn't know) so I got an additional 1.00 off...grand total for 12 Mega Rolls= 3.99

Viva Paper Towels 6 Rolls- 8.99 on sale with same in ad coupon as Angel Soft for 4.99..also had a .50 off MFR coupon which doubled...grand total 3.99

Coca-Cola is B2G2..which means buy 2 get 2 free...I always stock up on this deal..so awesome...you also get 2 free crackers...either Wheat Thins or Triscuits. I got one of each. So I would have normally paid 5.99 per 12 pk plus .60 CRV(4) plus 3.99 each for the crackers totaling 34.34 and I got it for 14.38 soo around 2.40 for each item!

Colgate was on sale for .99cents. Normally 3.49. I also had a .75 MFR coupon and my store doubles up to a dollar so I got another .25 off...which means it was totally FREE!!!!

InStyle Magazine which I usually buy each month is 3.99 and I had a MFR coupon for 2.00 off...total-1.99!

Last but not least...I have been holding on to two coupons for 2.00 off any two Nivea Lip Care Products. They were on sale for .99 a few weeks ago (normally 2.99) but someone nabbed them all!!!! I went in today and just checked to see if they were on sale again and they WERE!!!! Everything was fully stocked today it was awesome!...So I picked up 4 for .99 cents ea...minus the 4.00 in coupons...making them FREE!!!!

I had an awesome time saving money today...I also picked up a few more deals like bacon for 1.47. I am off to Target once I am done working for some more great deals.

Best Gift Ever!

Love my little man!

TV Chef Love

Do you watch Food Network or the Cooking Channel? Is there a Chef(s) that inspires you? For me it has always been Giada De Laurentiis, Ina Garten, Bobby Flay and Tyler Florence. Their food is simple. Their recipes are easy to follow (so important to me) and they are down to earth people.

I got the pleasure of meeting Giada a few years back when she was doing a book signing at the South Coast Plaza, Williams-Sonoma, for her book "Giada's Family Dinners". She was so sweet and so beautiful. I could not get a word out other than "Hi"...oh and "Thank You":). I love her love for food... it is contagious. Her recipes are so clean and simple.

Ina by far has the best recipes. Everything that I have made from her cookbooks are amazing. Super simple to follow. I neeeeeed her newest cookbook, "How Easy is That?". The Barefoot Contessa always seems to enjoy everything she makes and loves sharing it with others. Her recipe for a Summer Fruit Crostata is my new fav..I have made it four times now(minus the plums) and it is amazing. Keep forgetting to take a pic...but if you are in need of a new Spring/Summer Dessert try this one..you will love it.

Bobby Flay...oh Bobby. He is an all American guy. I love his style of cooking...total man in the kitchen. Not super refined but always makes everything look so amazing. His new show on the Cooking Channel "Brunch @ Bobby's" is the best show ever. Being that Brunch is my favorite type of meal to eat I love all his recipes. I recently made Scott a Poached Egg dish....delish! Bobby made it look so good... we looked at eachother and said we had to make it ASAP.


Last but not least...Tyler Florence. He is another Chef who I just love to try out his recipes. They are easy to follow and so comforting. He is known for Tyler's Ultimate...where he takes very popular dishes and makes them his way..which is awesome! He is full of energy and is all over the place. That is what I love about him..others may find it annoying when watching his show...his cameramen have a hard time following him...but that is how I am in the kitchen..when I know what I am doing and am loving a recipe. Total opposite when I am baking...I am in relax mode:). Anyways...back to Tyler. I have tried many of his recipes and they always turn out great..his whole roasted chicken is great. I do not have one of his cookbooks..sad to say. I have not bought a cookbook in so long with all the recipes online..but I need to get back to buying them. They are such a great resource to have in your kitchen. Hope you try out some of these recipes I shared and are inspired by your favorite Chefs to get cookin'!

Adventures in Couponing

Have you seen the new show on TLC called "Extreme Couponing"? If you haven't I highly suggest you check it out. Before the show I was a casual couponer. But since I started watching the show a few weeks ago I have stepped up my game. It is so addicting. It is amazing how much you can save your family if you are willing and able to put in the extra hours. Right now I am new to the game so it is taking me awhile to learn all the secrets. I learned quickly that people get the deals probably on the first day they are released so you have to be quick. You also have to learn all the crazy coupon jargon. It is easy to mis-read something and then there goes your deal. I learned a lot from The Krazy Coupon Lady who was featured on the show. Her website is amazing and has a lot of great tips to get you started.

I decided to set some rules for myself...because I was so excited about getting things for free or super cheap that I was spending way too much time searching for deals. I decided to only clip coupons and search for deals when Shane is sleeping. Limit it to 30 mins a day and to not buy something unless our family actually needs it or will use it in the future. Many of theses Extreme Couponers have stock piles that look like a grocery store within there own home!!!! They buy diapers when they don't have kids and pet treats when they don't have animals. Many of them do give them to family members and charities...so that is good..but I still think that they buy way too much of certain items just because they are free. It becomes a bit of a hoarding issue at that point. Anyways, I want to use this opportunity to save my family money if I can. Prices are so high these days..work is slow and we have done everything we can to pay the least amount on bills...so if I can get stuff for cheap or free...with a few hours work..hey why not.

Here is what I picked up this week:

Target:

Head and Shoulders(don't have dandruff...just want to clear that up..they make normal shampoo too:)).
Retail-4.74 each
MFR Q-BOGO So only paid 4.74 for both plus....
Store Q -1.00
Total:3.74 for both or 1.87 ea.

Huggies 112ct. Not shown
Retail-29.99
MFR Q-1.50
Store Q- 3.00
Total: 25.49 this may not seem like that great of a deal but it is hard to get good deals on name brand diapers and that is what I notmally buy so to get an additional 4.50 off I am pretty happy...Monday there is a really good deal on the Jumbo packs at Target so I am going back for more:)

Rimmel Mascara-
Retail-5.69
MFR Q-2.00
Store Q- 1.00
Total: 2.69

Kohl's
Easter Shoes for Shane:)
Retail-29.99(Seriously???)
Sale-16.99
Kohl's Cash-10.00
15% Q-3.21
Total- 3.78.... Score!!!!


Staples
HP Paper 
Retail- 5.99
Easy Rebate-5.99
Total: FREE!!!!! Came just in time..using a lot of paper printing out coupons:)

Fondant

Of all the baking I have done, I never have made or even used fondant. I have never taken any cake decorating classes, so, I really am a novice when it comes to cake decorating. Another reason I never cared to try to make my own or buy the premade fondant is because I think it tastes gross! I really love the way it looks and decided I at least need to cross it off my baking bucket list and make some.

To my surprise it was not that hard. Very sticky but actually really easy and fun to make. With my son's 2nd bday approaching I wanted to do a test run before and see if I could pull it off. I left most of the fondant white but made a yellow and green batch as well. I am going to let it rest over night and then hopefully make a cake tomorrow....fingers crossed...I will post pictures of it..unless it is horrible then most likely not:). Here is the original recipe I found...but tweaked it a bit using some ideas from other recipes. There are not too many pics because my hands were filled with Crisco for most of the process.

My fondant recipe

1 bag of mini marshmallows(10.5 oz)

3 TBS water

26 oz powdered sugar

In a greased microwave safe bowl add marshmallows and water. Microwave in 30 second intervals. I did 30 seconds, 30 seconds and then 20 seconds. Depending on your microwave my take more or less. Then top the marshmallow mixture with about 3/4 of the powdered sugar. Grease your work surface and then your hands generously. Now dump the mixture out on the work surface and begin kneading. Add the rest of the powdered sugar once the first amount is incorporated. Continue to grease your work surface and hands as needed. If at any point your fondant because dry and cracks you may need to add more water. I did not need to but I read that tip in case it does happen. I would knead for 5-10 minutes until you get a mixture that will stretch without tearing. (you should also not be able to see any bits of powdered sugar).

It is best to let it sit over night but you can let it sit for as little as 10 minutes and begin using. I covered my fondant in Crisco and then plastic wrap and then in a plastic baggie. One recipe said it will keep for months at room temperature and another said weeks in the fridge..so I don't know which to follow...I am going to go ahead and put it in the fridge and see how that goes.

***Notes***

***I used liquid food coloring because that is all I had. I crossed my fingers and hoped it worked. I think it came out well and didn't effect the consistency at all. I believe you can use the gel food coloring as well.

***I began to use my KitchenAid stand mixer..but it got so thick I was afraid it was going to break my mixer and I would have cried for days! So I took it out and just hand kneaded it as another recipe had suggested..much better!

***As always..Mise en Place...have all your ingredients prepared and measured and ready to go before you begin..oh and make it once the kiddos are in bed...I accidentally added the wrong amount of powdered sugar because my kiddo came in and distracted me:). Hopefully it turns out...more to come tomorrow...hopefully!

Preschool...or No Preschool..that is the question???!!

"Knowing what to expect from a teacher is a really good thing, of course: It lets you get the right answers more quickly than you would otherwise. Indeed, these studies show that 4-year-olds understand how teaching works and can learn from teachers. But there is an intrinsic trade-off between that kind of learning and the more wide-ranging learning that is so natural for young children. Knowing this, it's more important than ever to give children's remarkable, spontaneous learning abilities free rein. That means a rich, stable, and safe world, with affectionate and supportive grown-ups, and lots of opportunities for exploration and play. Not school for babies."By Alison Gopnik



On my MSN homepage I found an article that stood out to me "Why preschool should not be school" . The Hubs and I just had this conversation with some friends about whether or not our kids would go to preschool. The Hubs was very adamant about our son going...while our friend did not think it was right to put children in "school" that early. He had more of the idea of let kids be kids...while The Hubs was on the side of preschool being a great tool for social skills. The Hubs is very social and loves people and our friend(who I always agree with) is not a social person.
I did not go to preschool and so this whole idea is new to me. I am so worried about making the wrong decision. The Hubs went to Kiddie College..spelled Kiddie Kollege or something clever like that I am sure(misspelling college though is not a very good idea for a school if you ask me..but I am just assuming that..forgive me Kiddie College if I am wrong).  Anyways...I found this article on Slate.com to be so interesting. They write about a few learning experiments done on 4 year olds. One approach is the teaching method where the children imitated  exactly what the teacher showed them in a series of tests with a toy. The other approach, the adult acted clueless and tried to get the toy to work but left the kids to figure it out themselves. The point of this article was to show the two different learning styles of children and which produced a more positive or productive outcome. One reader suggested that maybe the teacher should act as if she did not know how to work the toy but then figure it out and walk through the steps with the children until they figure it out. That was my thoughts as well. Isn't that what a teacher is suppose to do? Teach...help our children to come to the correct answer/outcome??? But also is this style of learning to be left until they are of age to truly be able to understand what the teacher is trying to accomplish.
The whole "your baby can read" infomercials are a crack up. I don't want my baby to read..I want to read to him. I want to teach him his ABC's and then once it is time for preschool or Kindergarten he can further hone his reading skills. I have friends who are like "my baby can read" or "my sister's baby can already read at 2 years old"... oh isn't that special:). Learning is a beautiful thing and if your child can read at an early age that is great and I am not opposed to that but when it is forced and you become a "proud parent"..the kind of parent that boasts of their child's achievements to EVERYONE...you need to ask yourself if it is for the good of your child's education or for your own self worth.
I have friends who their child has not said more than a few words..when my son is talking up a storm...but their child excelled in walking way before or other skills that my son took forever to pick up.
In conclusion I think that the pressure on kids is so amazing these days. American kids are already stressed out by the time they reach elementary school. I remember my sister taking all these AP classes in High School and even Junior High. She was doing homework at all hours of the night and then had to read during the summer. She never got a break. She loves education...me on the other hand I passed all my classes..never put much effort into anything "extra". Would be darned if I had to do anything school related during the summer and tried to finish all my homework within an hour of getting home or in homeroom.I never understood why we had to spend hours at school and then another few hours on homework. Completely different learning styles. I have to say my sister is smarter than me but I have an amazing job. She is still experiencing the college life...I never did. I worked my way up and maybe she will not have to. Hey but I have no school loans!!! Actually she got most of her schooling paid for because she is a smart smart girl! Two different roads but would either of us change it NO. We learn differently but are happy with the results. I think that is the approach that we are going to have to take with our little one. We really need to be aware of how he learns and if preschool will be right for him. Here are my pros and cons and then I will stop...didn't realize I had so much to say on this topic!!!!

Pros:

1. Make new friends..a good social outlet
2. Learn from someone else other than Mommy and Daddy
3. Rest for Mama...hehehehe

Cons:

1. Force learning too young..not enough free time to explore
2. The cost of preschool
3. Learn bad habits

P.S. I looked up Kiddie Kollege online and it came up. One in the area The Hubs grew up..so I will have to ask The M-I-L if that was the one:).

Tie Dyed Eggs...literally!

 

I saw these eggs on Our Best Bites and could not believe that you can dye and egg using a 100% silk scarf. The print on the tie will actually transfer onto the egg. Eggcellent! You have to check this out...I see a thirft store run in my future!

Spring has Sprung!

I know we still have another week...but I bought some daffodils and Robin's Egg Whoppers at the store yesterday. That is spring for me:). Outside of my office window I can see the beautiful peach blossoms and this blue and yellow bird that visits it everyday. My bestie had her baby on Saturday... new life is all around me:) Happy Spring!

Miss Sydney!

Fat Tuesday Gumbo

I was craving some Louisiana cooking..so was happy that Mardi Gras was coming up and I decided to make some Gumbo. I love this recipe. I have made it a few times before. A spicy bowl of goodness!!!!

Ingredients:
2 TBS Flour
2 TBS Butter
1 Onion, diced
1 Green Bellpepper, diced
1 TBS Garlic, minced
2 c. Smoked Sausage, sliced
4 c. Chicken Breast, cooked, diced
4 c. Chicken Broth
1 28oz. can Diced Tomatoes
1 tsp. Dried Thyme
2 Bay Leaves
1/2 tsp Cayenne Pepper
1/2# Shrimp deveined and tails removed
1 tsp File
s/p TT

Directions

1. In a large pot combine Flour and Butter to make a roux.
2. Add Onion, Bellpepper and Garlic. Saute 5 minutes.
3. Add Sausage, Chix, Chix Broth, Tomaotes, Thyme, Bay Leaves and Cayenne Pepper.
4. Simmer 45 minutes
5. Add Shrimp, File and Salt and Pepper.
6. Serve with rice.

Can I get a do-over???

Have you ever just wanted a do-over? A Mulligan? Or a complete renovation/makeover of your life? I have been at that point many times in my own life. I ask myself why did I not do this. Or why didn't I start something earlier in life? Why don't I have more self control...why didn't I share my true feelings...why didn't I get involved in the lives of others. I begin to examine my life and it is full of what ifs and why nots.
Being shy doesn't help these feelings of regret. I miss out on so many great events and relationships. The fear that runs my life is crippling at times. This is when I cry out to God and pray for a do-over. I tend to think I need to run away..start a new life...a life where no one knows that I am afraid...or knows of my short comings.I get an urge to transform my outer being about once a year. A makeover can make me feel like I am starting over...but we all know that it needs to be a makeover of the inside and not the outside. Praise God that each day is new. I don't need to start from the very beginning. God gives us a chance to start new each day..each moment. Can I get an "AMEN"?

"Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:
Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness" Lamentations 3:21-23

The idea of this post came into my mind when I read this post. The blogger had picked up a book titled: Everything I Know I Learned from Home Improvement. One of the lines in the book that really made me think was from the chapter titled: Mistakes Create Possibilities. It states: "We all want a makeover because it feels like starting over. Yet we forget the real change requires planning and hard work". This is referring to a home makeover, but also is tying it into our own day to day lives. We think that if we do something so drastic that is will detract from the pain...fear...worry..or whatever is going on in our lives. By transforming the outside it will somehow make the inside change. But it couldn't be more opposite. We need to work hard and making the real change in our hearts and minds.

1 Samuel 16: 7 But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”


I am thankful for the wonderful life I have. A loving husband...the cutest, smartest..most talented son:) and great friends and family. I am thankful that I don't need to start over...but if I did...I would hope I would come back as a Black Woman..mmmhmmm...you read right....a Black Gospel Singer to be exact. And I would sing this song below all day to my Lord. Who knows maybe I do sound like a Gospel Singer to God...praying that at least when I get to heaven I can sing with some great power and soul!


Great is thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
there is no shadow of turning with thee;
thou changest not, thy compassions, they fail not;
as thou hast been thou forever will be.

Great is thy faithfulness! Great is thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
all I have needed thy hand hath provided;
great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
sun, moon and stars in their courses above
join with all nature in manifold witness
to thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
thy own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

Amy Sedaris' Vanilla Cupcakes

I needed a cupcake fix. I only had 2 sticks of butter so I had to make a small batch..but all I really needed was one cupcake...ok two. Amy Sedaris is a comedian/actress...I knew her name sounded familiar..recipe sounded good..so I crossed my fingers and hoped this actress knew what she was doing...and she sure did. The cupcakes were moist and a perfect soft texture. I had to 1/2 the recipe...which always scares me..but they turned out great and I got a baker's dozen out of it. I also made a new recipe for the frosting. It was a mixture between a creamy buttercream and whipped frosting. I had to really make a small batch of this and it turned out really good. Here is the recipe for Amy Sedaris' Vanilla Cupcakes via Epicurious:

Amy Sedaris' Vanilla Cupcakes(Full recipe...I cut it in half)
Epicurious
October 2006
by Amy Sedaris

Ingredients
1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 1/2 cups flour
1 1/4 cups milk

Turn oven on to 375 degrees F.

Put butter in mixer and beat at medium speed until somewhat smooth. Pour in sugar and beat well. Add 2 eggs. I like to crack the eggs on the side of the bowl while it is moving, which can be really stupid. I like to take chances. Yes, I have had to throw away my batter because I lost eggshells in the mix. Yes, it was a waste of food and yes, I know how expensive butter is, but what can I say? I'm a daredevil. Mix well. Add: vanilla, baking powder, salt, flour, and milk. Beat until it looks like it is supposed to and pour into individual baking cups, until they are about 2/3 full. Bake for 20 minutes or until golden brown. Should produce 24 cupcakes; I get 18 because I'm doing something wrong, although my cupcakes were voted second best in the city by New York Magazine.
***Notes by Amy:) NY mag named them 2nd best and I can see why! She also has a buttercream recipe...but I had my heart set on trying a different one..I'll have to try it out and let you know what I think.


Oh and here is the Buttercrean Frosting recipe I used in case you are looking for something a little lighter(in texture not calories). Can't remember where I found it...some blog out in blogland.

Buttercream Frosting (Sorry no photo..having issues..I am not able to put more than one pic up...argghhh)

2 c. butter
4 c. powdered sugar
2 tsp. vanilla
pinch of salt
1/4 c. milk or heavy cream ( I used milk..but want to try the heavy cream)

Beat butter and powdered sugar on low until creamed..then add remaining ingredients one at a time at medium speed for 3-4 minutes..until well combined and the desired consistency. Add more powdered sugar if it is too thin or less milk..whatever works for you.

Enjoy and happy baking!